Don't Mess With the Mocha!

If you know my mom very well, you probably know that she has a zero tolerance policy when it comes to stupidity. I inherited the same trait, but I haven't refined mine quite like my mom just yet. My mom has. Combine that with a hard and fast addiction to Iced Grande No-Whip, Extra Ice Mochas, and what you get is a hilarious Starbucks story! (Bear with me, it's a long one!)

Over the weekend, we visited my sister in West Jordan, Utah (right next to Salt Lake City). There happened to be a Starbucks especially close to my sister's house, and right on the route to and from shopping and the freeway. The next closest Starbucks was closed for renovations, so we frequented this one A LOT over the weekend. (Every 6 hours or so)

Before we even made it to my sister's house Friday morning, we stopped and refueled on caffeine. It was a fairly uneventful visit to an average Starbucks. Over the course of the next couple days, we visited the same Starbucks several times. After splitting up Saturday for some shopping, my mom told the following story to us at dinner:

While her and my dad were out shopping, they went through the Starbuck's drivethru. The drivethru was backed up with 5 or 6 cars, and as they waited they could see that there were problems. Drinks were passed out the window to several cars ahead of them, and then passed back. Apparently this branch of Starbucks has some trouble keeping orders straight. When Mom finally made it to the window, the guy took their payment card and then verified my mom's drink. The only problem? It wasn't the right drink. By this time, they had already waited in line for much longer than normal. After sitting at the window for a couple more minutes, during which time the guy continued to take orders from cars behind them, but didn't run my mom's card, my mom had reached her stupidity limit.
"Give me my card," she told the guy behind the window.
"What," he replied, obviously confused, "I haven't ran it yet!?"
"I know," says Mom, "Give it back, we're leaving." So he returns her card and my Mom drives off to find another Starbucks.

Later than evening, we decide to head out to the mall to exchange a pair of shoes. Of course, we can't go by the Starbucks without stopping for a caffeine fix. "I hope it's not the same guy," my mom says as we pull up to the menu, where we're greeted like this: "Welcome to Starbucks. How can I brighten your day?"

"Oh no," groans my mom, while my sister and I bust a gut laughing. "Maybe he won't recognize me. But really, how many people order an "Iced Grande, No-Whip, Xtra Ice Mocha?"
Then things go from bad to worse, as he proceeds to repeat our order over the speaker incorrectly. Already, my mom's stupidity meter is going off as she reorders the drinks, and my sister and I continue laughing. Finally, we get our total, $11 and something.
When we make it to the window, the guy opens the window and says, "$12.53, Oh, wait, did I say something else?" At this point, if there was any way my mom was going to be forgiving, now this guy doesn't have a prayer. Hasn't anyone told him that messing with the iced no-whip mocha with xtra ice is life threatening?
"Yes, you said something else," my mom says, and now we're all laughing harder.

Then, the guy asks, "Were you here earlier? Did you drive off?" which sends Jami and I into even more fits of laughter.
"Yes," my mom admits, and then the guy wins stupidity award of the year as he asks, "Can I ask why?"

My mom gives the guy her ultimate death stare and replies, "If you have to ask why, then I'm not going to bother explaining it to you." This leaves him speachless with his jaw on the floor.

Really, there's only so much stupidity one can take. But now the story gets unbelievable, because the next thing this guy does is bring us all WHITE iced mochas. My sister ordered a white mocha, but mine and my mom's are supposed to be regular mochas.
"Those aren't WHITE mochas, are they?" demands my mom before he even makes it to the window. See, we can tell by the color that they aren't right. It comes from years of Starbucks addiction.
"Uh, uh, no, I don't think so," they guys stutters. But alas, they are. So we're forced to wait even longer as he has the girl remake our drinks. Apparantley he was too traumatized to finish, because he dissappears and the girl brings our corrected drinks to the window.

The next morning, Sunday, we stop by this same Starbucks on our way out of town to head home. This time I'm driving my car, and Mom's in the passenger seat. "There's no way it'll be the same guy," we're thinking. But when we get there, we hear "Welcome to Starbucks. How can I brighten your day?"

This sends my mom digging through her purse for the new sunglasses she had purchased the night before. "Oh Lord," she says, "Put your window visor down." As if this guy isn't probably already on to us since we ordered "Iced grande no-whip mochas with xtra ice."

We make it out of the drive thru without a scene this time, although I do have to repeat my order twice, the second time very loudly and slowly. After we got our drinks, I had the urge to tell him that he could rest easy, we were headed home for good.

I don't know what the problem was at this Starbucks. I have never received such bad service so many times at one branch. I have also never had such bad service and not been apologized to or given a coupon for a free drink. Around home, there is an occassional glitch and our drink is wrong, or too slow, and we always get a coupon and apology. I'm not out to get free drinks, this only happens about once a year, and it's usually not even bad enough to require a coupon. They give them out anyways, which speaks to their high customer service standards. However, this particular West Jordan Starbucks doesn't seem to know about this policy. Perhaps they forgot to close for training a couple of weeks ago?